Oh Mr Bassman, you’ve got that c-certain s-something when you go . . .
Believe it or not that was my dad’s favourite song. he used to sing it all the time when we were kids.
Oh Mr Bassman, you’ve got that c-certain s-something when you go . . . A-aye yi a-aye yi aye yi
I had no idea what it was about. Neither did my sister. neither did my dad. what even is a bassman? I was too young to know much about music. I just thought it was a man who really liked skirting boards.
Oh Mr Bassman, you’ve got that c-certain s-something when you go . . . A-aye yi a-aye yi aye yi I wanna be a bassman too.
I think he only sung it to us because it had weird sounds in it. The only other song he sang a lot was I’m late, I’m late, for a very important date. no time to say hello goodbye I’m late I’m late I’m late. But Mr Bassman. Oh, Mr Bassman was the thing.
Oh Mr Bassman, you’ve got that c-certain s-something when you go . . . A-aye yi a-aye yi aye yi I wanna be a bassman too. Bur b-b-bur b-b-bur b-b-bur b-bur bur
I was listening to the radio. It was Sounds of the Sixties presented by Brian Mathews. (‘This is your old mate Brian Mathews saying, that’s your lot for this week, see you next week’). And he said, The next song is from 1961 And it was a minor hit for Johnny Cymbal and it’s called Mr Bassman, and seriously, it was like a kick in the goolies.
And the song started. and the song played. and the song came out of the radio and all this time I’d thought it was just a song that my dad had made up and all the time I thought it was a piece of genius that my dad had made up and I tell you that a small piece of my childhood suddenly dissolved.
but the more I listened, the more I thought, oh, he’s doing it wrong. Johnny Cymbal has cocked it up. Johnny Cymbal is singing the wrong words. This is nothing like the song my dad used to sing. this is not how the song goes. this is not how the song goes. THIS is how the song goes.
Oh Mr Bassman, you’ve got that c-certain s-something when you go . . . A-aye yi a-aye yi aye yi I wanna be a bassman too. Bur b-b-bur b-b-bur b-b-bur b-bur bur BUR BUR BURRR B-B-B-BURR BURR!
(Pause).
Anyway, Just thought I’d tell you that. I’d better be off, now. I’d better be off.
Robert Garnham 